Frame Is All
A general idea of persuasion and seduction is frame.
Any time you are having a conversation with a specific outcome.
This is more true in sales than seduction.
For seduction, the outcome is already there.
So you don’t need to consciously think about it.
Sales, on the other hand, is more conscious.
Nobody is going to automatically like a car or a house just because.
When people are shopping for big ticket items, they generally have a few solid criteria in mind.
But for seduction, it’s more or less automatic.
Girls like guys.
Guys like girls.
This is why there are 8 billion people in the world.
A guy talks to a girl with a pretty confident frame.
The girl talks to the guy with a pretty confident frame.
Guys liking girls and vice versa is a natural outcome.
Despite beliefs in things like soul mates, it’s actually pretty easy for most guys to like most girls.
And most girls to like most guys.
Love Anybody
It doesn’t seem like this now, but it’s always been this way.
For most of human history, for any guy or gal there were very FEW opportunities.
So way back then, people hooked up with whoever they had a chance to.
The idea of dating around for a few years before settling is something new.
Something our brains don’t really know how to handle.
Which is why modern dating is so difficult.
It makes it SEEM like we are doing something conscious like shopping around for the ideal house or car.
But this is OPPOSITE to how our collection of “love instincts” work.
First, we feel a sense of attraction for the opposite sex.
THEN we find out about each other.
And our love instincts, which include all our biases, start to REVERSE ENGINEER what we think about them.
So the relationship would last.
Today, we do it backwards.
Reverse Polarity Love
We look for the conscious criteria FIRST.
This is putting the cart before the horse.
Or looking for the effect without the cause.
What is the cause?
Natural, deep, ancient, male-female attraction.
This is why the idea of “outcome independence” is ideal in romance.
But not so much for selling cars and houses.
The IDEAL frame of mind for talking to a potential romantic partner is to ASSUME familiarity.
Forget about trying to impress them, or be impressed by them.
Let that stuff some later.
Be Friendly To Everybody
But the first few moments, in those critical first interactions, ASSUME familiarity.
Assume they are a normal human, just like you.
Assume they have good intentions, just like you.
Assume they have social anxiety, just like you.
Assume they have tons of worries and anxieties about life, juts like you.
This is easy to assume because they are all true.
This can be hard to remember.
But you can build it in with a kind of meditation.
One that will help you find familiarity and friendship in EVERYBODY you cross paths with.
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