Some will say that when you’ve got approach anxiety, the only way is to grab your balls and muscle through the fear. However, there’s a much easier way.
The way the brain works is that if we don’t consciously control our thoughts, we’ll tend to drift toward negative thinking.
This has kept us alive for hundreds of thousands of years. After all, we evolved in a time and environment where danger was everywhere, so if we weren’t on the lookout, all the time, we wouldn’t have lasted.
This comes across as approach anxiety when out in the field. You see a hot girl, you imagine doing wonderful things with her, and your brain suddenly drifts to all those things that could go wrong.
We evolved in a time when a guy would approach maybe ten girls in his entire life, since that’s all that were really available at the time. So when you get nervous, your brain is trying to protect you. Your instincts don’t know that there’s TONS of girls out there, literally, to choose from.
So how do you circumvent this seemingly automatic nervous response?
Simply choose to think another thought. Now, you’ve got to do this consistently, and consciously. You can’t just “flip a switch” and get rid of your approach anxiety, like magic.
You’ve got to keep good thoughts in your mind the whole time, otherwise those “bad” thoughts will automatically sweep in there.
So, what good thoughts should you think?
Anything that gets you smiling and comfortable when looking at her and thinking about her.
I usually try to imagine her as a little kid in kindergarten. Maybe you’ve got a friend you think about in a certain way. Then you see pictures of them as a little kid, and they looked so cute. Now when you look at your friend, with the thought of them as a little kid running around screaming and laughing, they’ll look a little different.
This is great because it quickly sets up a positive feedback loop.
You look at her, and remember to imagine her as a little kid, running around screaming and playing and laughing. This makes you smile while looking at her. Not a lecherous smile or a horny smile, but an honest “I appreciate you” smile.
This, of course, will make her feel at ease and likely smile back at you.
Then you’re off to the races.
This will happen a lot easier, and a lot quicker, if you’ve got the Alpha Mindset. Having this will quickly crush all those irrational fears for good, so approaching and talking to cute girls will be fun, just like it’s supposed to.
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