Self Sabotage
There you are, on one side of the room.
You see somebody.
You flirt with that somebody.
But when it comes time to walk over there and say, “hey,” you waffle.
You come up with a bunch of reasons why it would be better to just kind of hang out.
This is a common human experience.
Or how about this one.
You’re doing really well.
Much better than you have in the past.
Maybe a new job that pays 50% more than you’ve ever made.
Maybe a relationship with somebody who is 50% hotter than anybody you’ve ever dated.
But this that deep feeling of dread comes.
Danger!
Weak at first, and slowly stronger.
Some call this “imposter syndrome.”
Like “they” are going to find out who you REALLY are.
This is in plenty of movies.
A deep fear the hero feels when they are in love with a FANTASTIC person.
When they find out who they really are, they’ll flee.
For some, this is “verified” by experience.
Verified is in quotes because it’s NOT really verified.
If you did actually show them who you really are, they wouldn’t run.
You only THINK you showed them who you really are.
You really only expressed to them what you really WANT.
And you did so in a very UNATTRACTIVE way.
A “please love me I’ll do anything” kind of way.
Complex Human
That is NOT who you really are.
Who you really are is hugely complex.
Getting to know who you REALLY are would take years.
Many shared experiences under many different contexts.
But WHY do we do this?
Why do we want something, or even start to get something, but then we blow ourselves out?
This is even a line from an old Kinks song, “Destroyer.”
“You get a good thing going and you blow yourself out…”
Why do we do this?
We all share a common experience.
Data Sponge
When we were kids our brains were in data collection mode.
Curiosity driven experience collection mode.
We HAVE to go through this process.
It’s how we’re wired.
When we are born, we HAVE to hit the ground running.
But in the process of having a lot of curiosity driven, data and experience collections, we tend to be loud.
We knock a lot of stuff over.
We throw stuff across the room just to see what will happen.
This is NORMAL.
Other Shoe
But you’re an adult watching this, this isn’t normal, this is FRUSTRATING.
It’s only a matter of time before we, as kids, here the adults screaming at us:
DUDE! SHUT THE F UP!
This one two punch lives in everybody’s brain.
It’s NOBODY’S fault.
So we’ve been trained in this two-step hesitancy.
See something you desire.
Or be in the process of getting something you desires.
And then inwardly and subconsciously cringing, waiting for the other shoe to drop.
But as adults, it never will drop.
There IS no other shoe.
Train this instead, and have some fun.
Learn How:
Demon Destruction
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