Set Up Is Best Part
I have this friend who loves to create these very deep, very well thought out, very long game pranks.
His last one was one he pulled on his toastmasters group.
First, he showed up at a new club.
He always wore a suit, he always gave very professional, very boring, but very confident speeches.
Benefits of Dental Floss
They assumed he wasn’t there to learn how to speak, but to brush up on his speaking skills, or maybe fine tune some new ideas.
Once he’d trained then to see him as a professional, confident, outgoing but a pretty boring speaker of pretty boring speeches, he lowered the boom.
Better Than You
I have a couple of friends who enjoy pushing the limits.
They live on the other side of each other’s backyards.
They often barbecue and play golf together.
But they recently agreed to place the old wooden fence separating their yards with a brick wall.
That’s when they started to out do one another.
I’ll See You And Raise You A Brick
One guy would go out into his backyard, and see the other guy’s side as one layer of bricks higher than his side.
So he’d match his layer of bricks and then add another layer of bricks.
Neither wanted to admit failure, so this has been going on for several weeks.
Underground Water
I used to know this guy who was an ultra conspiracy theorist and an ultra prepper.
His biggest enemy was the EPA.
In his state, even if you collect rainwater by accident the EPA will give you a fine, since the EPA requires a special permit from the EPA over any body of water.
So he secretly drilled down through his basement to a deep underground stream, and built a secret well in his basement.
But then he realized that if he stopped using regular water, the EPA would know something was up.
This’ll Fool ‘Em
So he turned on the house in his backyard to just a trickle, so he could start using his secret water, just to secretly give the finger to the government.
I had a friend that had a grand plan to lose weight.
He wasn’t quite sure HOW he was going to lose weight.
But his business plan was to lose a bunch of weight, and then become famous on social media for being a weight loss king, and then get a bunch of endorsements from sports companies etc.
But he ended up finding a very, very experimental and near perfect way to lose weight.
Pickles, Eh?
He discovered it accidentally, but since this is a very specific diet, and it’s kind of a weird one, he doesn’t know how to monetize it.
It allows you to pretty much eat anything you want, but before you eat it you have to pickle it.
Like you can go down to Jack in the Box, get a couple Bacon Ultimate Cheeseburgers, a few tacos.
Jack In The Pickle
But before you eat them, you have to soak them in vinegar for a week.
This somehow changes the chemical composition so you get the same Jack in the Box eating sensation, but you fill up much more quickly.
He’s even had a lot of custom made pickling jars.
So he’ll order a large pizza and put it into a very wide but very shallow picking jar.
Then a week later, he’ll only need one slice of pickled pizza and he’ll be completely satisfied.
I’m Out
Eventually, all the contractors stopped adding layers of bricks, as they were worried about liability.
So each one of them continues to layer more bricks on top, but by using drones.
Which means it will ultimately tip over on one of their houses, probably at night, and probably killing everybody inside.
Unfortunately, the continuous trickle of water slowly eroded the entire neighborhood, including his own foundation.
Don’t Mess With The Underground
Once the foundation cracked, the massive pressure from the underground stream came gushing up, and turned the entire neighborhood into a lake.
He showed up wearing a very strange, glow in the dark orange suit.
He gave two speeches at once.
Magic Cheese
One was about how to make the perfect grilled cheese.
The other was about the evolution of magic in the middle ages.
He would say one sentence from the speech about grilled cheese.
Then he would say one sentence from the speech about medieval magic.
After about a minute, the audience was so confused that they went into a sudden hypnotic trance.
What Happened?
They came out of the trance about an hour later.
There only experience was seeing who they thought was the stuffy serious guy.
But then they were hit such a purposely confusing and oscillating stream of ideas about grilled cheeses and magic.
This was just too much for their brains to take, so they just blanked right out.
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