If you want to get good at something, you’ve got to practice.
This is pretty self evident, from everything to cooking to violin playing.
When we see somebody who is really good at golf, or is some kind of super human juggler, we realize on some level that person has spent a lot of time practicing their craft.
Nobody ever picks up a bunch of bowling pins and starts naturally throwing them around.
And even the most beautiful sounding violinist screeched like a dying cat when they first started.
Meeting and seducing girls is no different.
Even the most charismatic “naturals” that you know weren’t always like that. They had their very first conversation with a woman at some point, usually in grade school, or maybe even kindergarten.
And when they talked to her, they didn’t know what they were saying or doing or even what they wanted.
All they knew that talking to girls was fun, and the more they did it, the better they got.
This built up their self confidence, self esteem and their belief about what they were capable of.
This shows through their body language, facial expressions, and even the speed with which they scan a room. Not nervously, like some poor sexless guy desperate for attention, but like a laid back killer who KNOWS deep in his bones that he’s gonna get some sooner or later.
The secret to getting from where you are now, to being THAT GUY is the same way he got that way.
Practice. But not as seeing it as practice. Seeing it as fun.
The intention you set when you enter into a conversation will do wonders for your game.
If you are intending to get a number, or even get laid in record time, that is something specific that may or may not happen.
But if your intention is to simply have fun, you simply CANNOT lose. No matter what she says or does, it’s simply something to enjoy. Flip it around, out frame it, reframe it, laugh at yourself getting cut to pieces, whatever.
Once you let go of any kind of “need” for success, something magic will happen.
See, everybody’s a natural on the inside. Humans are kind of hard wired to meet and make more humans.
It’s just that when you layer a bunch of fears and anxieties on top of your inner natural, it messes things up.
The easiest way to release your inner natural is to simply relax, and have fun.
A VERY easy way to do this to have several HUGE things in your life that you’re creating.
That way, whenever you see a cutie, you won’t immediately see her as the solution to all your problems. You’ll see her as a unique individual to be discovered and enjoyed.