A Boy And His Pet
Once there was a man.
Who had a pet kangaroo.
He loved his kangaroo.
So he taught him many things.
How to speak English.
How to make sandwiches.
How to play the piano.
How to play hopscotch.
He even toilet trained him.
Let’s Go For A Walk
One day..
He was walking downtown.
Without his kangaroo on a leash.
And without his kangaroo poop kit.
The police game him two tickets.
The man complained.
The kangaroo complained.
Buddy, Lemme See Some I.D.
But because the kangaroo didn’t have a drivers license.
They arrested him.
And took him to jail.
Now the man has a new mission in life.
To free the kangaroo.
He believes that kangaroos are the missing link.
To surviving the coming calamity.
Of our rapidly decaying economy.
And quickly accelerating social fabric.
And Kangaroos are our only hope.
Under Your Bed
Once there was a woman.
Who had terrible nightmares.
About monsters under her bed.
That were waiting for her to fall asleep.
So they could come out.
And watch her while she slept.
And put ideas into her brains.
So she went to many therapists.
Uh, No Thanks
Who wanted to put her on drugs.
She went to many hypnotists.
Who caused even more troubles.
She tried many books on self hypnosis.
Which was mostly flim flam nonsense.
The Art of War
Finally she discovered.
The works of Sun Tsu.
About battles and victories.
The most important one.
Was about how to conquer enemies.
And that was to make them your friends.
Mind If I Lie Here?
So, she started sleeping under her bed.
With her now monster friend.
And it turns out the reason.
The monster was under the bed.
Is he was afraid of her.
Now they’re friends.
And have lived happily ever after.
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