Dangerous Inventor
I have this neighbor that lives a few doors down.
He’s incredibly intelligent, and retired in his mid forties because of a couple of patents he invented.
He loves hobbies, building things, most of which would get him arrested if anybody knew about this.
Instant Turkey
His latest invention is a combination of a barbecue and a pressure cooker.
I didn’t believe when he told me about this, but he cooked an entire turkey, straight from the freezer to the dinner table, in about fifteen minutes.
I know this other inventor type guy, but this guy is more insane than anything else.
Not Quite Evil Villain
He’s had his heart broken a few times.
And he was unexpectedly fired from a dream job a few times.
Luckily, one of this unexpected firing got him a few million dollars in a law suit.
But his self confidence has been utterly obliterated.
He was never a confident guy to begin with.
Deeper Plans
Luckily he’s got going to turn into a super villain, but his plans for getting revenge on the world are a little strange, to say the least.
Everything on Earth is a closed system, but lately our financial systems are all interrelated.
Before, if the currency of the Roman empire collapsed, it wouldn’t have much direct or immediate effect on the currency of China.
Slow Decreasing Trade
Except for maybe some decreased trade through the two countries.
But even then, what happened in Rome would eventually work it’s way around the world.
But because of the fungibility of modern currencies, the feedback system is very tight, and very instant.
Mirror Solar System
Astronomers believe they’ve found a mirror image of Earth.
Same basic structure, same basic atmosphere, same distance from a more or less same sized sun.
The only drawback is it’s about 10,000 light years away, which would make contact impossible due to relativistic limitations.
Mental Teleportation
Of course, it is possible that they are sufficiently advanced, which could mean they’ve found a way to circumvent speed of light restraints.
Perhaps they’ve figured out what we might naively call worm hole travel.
Or they’ve figured out a way to energetically teleport themselves in a way they can’t possibly conceive of.
Some scientists believe this to be a Doppelganger planet.
They Are Like You
Filled with people just like us.
And they’ve been here, watching every one of us, for reasons we might never understand.
But since they can only do this during the deepest sleeping state, that’s when they show up.
And those nights when you have night terrors, when you up, terrified, and unable to move, this might be a mis-calibrated dream data transfer.
Watching You Sleep
Normally they wait next to you, in their energetic form.
And they watch you carefully as you start to fall asleep.
The first transitional moment is when you are drifting off and you make that first transition into light sleep.
That is when they enter your consciousness, since you aren’t using it.
And they follow you down, all the way down, into your deep delta dreaming state.
Mis-Calibration
But if they make a mistake, and shift too soon or too late, that will create the night terror effect.
You’ll only have partial access of your mind, as they’ll still be in there, doing experiments.
And they have to hold you in a state of terror, but only so yo don’t move.
Chopping Off Arms
Kind of like during the Civil War, when they had to amputate limbs without any anesthesia.
It hurts, it’s terrifying, and it might ruin you emotionally and psychologically for the rest of your life, but it’s in your own best interests.
And since the data flow rate is much, much faster in the dream world, if you do happen to wake up, it will seem like much, much longer than it really is.
Kind of like you get into an accident, and go in slow motion.
Fungibility of Death
He said that if any of the world’s currencies collapse, which has happened thousands of times since the dawn of civilization, the results will be catastrophic.
A common response to the collapse of any currency and therefore a destruction of all supply lines, is an instantaneous transition into cannibalism.
Goes With Anything
His plan is to create the most delicious barbecue sauce ever imagined.
The kind that would go with everything.
But also the kind whose molecular structure won’t be discernable even with the most advanced spectrophotometer.
Watch This!
Sometimes he has dinner parties, if only to prank his friends.
He’ll say he’s developed a super delicious turkey recipe, and tell them that dinner will be served at five.
Then he’ll get them all liquored up, pull the still frozen out of the freezer at 4:30 and say he’s going to get started cooking dinner.
Dude, Serious?
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