More Than Words
One of the biggest mistakes you can make socially is paying too much attention on the words of any conversation.
Think of this from an advertising perspective.
Most of our decisions are made emotionally.
Advertisers and marketers have known this for a long time.
If you want to persuade somebody to buy something, you need to do it emotionally.
If you tried to use logic why they should buy a certain article of clothing or pair of shoes, you’d never sell anything.
But it goes much deeper than this.
We make decisions emotionally, but then we describe them rationally.
This is one of the foundational principles of Cialdini’s work on persuasion and influence.
The stories we tell to yourselves WHY we do things are never the real reason.
Flow Like A Butterfly
If you’re having a conversation with somebody this is also true.
They are talking about what they want, why they want it, what they don’t want, why they don’t want it.
But these are word-based stories they are telling themselves.
Few people can come close to describing their complex emotions with words.
This is why focusing even MOSTLY on the words puts you at a huge disadvantage.
Those with either a lot of practice or a lot of natural intuition don’t need to worry about this.
They just need to vibe their way forward.
Just like a very highly trained boxer doesn’t need to think rationally about blocks and counterpunches.
They just, as Ali famously said, “float like a butterfly, sting like a bee.”
A very, very appropriate metaphor.
Once you understand the real, metaphorical meanings of words and phrases, you can do the same.
People speak in metaphors FAR more than we realize.
We speak in metaphors, think in metaphors and dream in metaphors.
Focusing ONLY on the words people are saying would be like expecting words to be all you need to describe a beautiful work of art.
Or maybe saving money on a vacation by calling some random dude at the Grand Canyon and asking them to describe it to you.
Most of the time, for most things, words don’t ever do ANYTHING justice.
Which is why you need to look beneath the words.
To listen to their metaphorical stories and understand their REAL mind.
Understand their REAL desires.
Understand their REAL fears.
Do this and you will connect with them far more than anybody they’ve ever met.
Whoever they are.
For whatever reason you want.
Mind Persuasion has plenty of books and courses to teach you how to speak hypnotically and persuasively.