Good Cheesy Advice
There’s a piece of advice for actors.
One that sounds kind of cheesy.
And that is to “own your space.”
This can help you become much more believable.
Much more confident.
This is related to the idea of “home field advantage.”
When you’re playing home game, you have the crowd on your side.
You are playing in the same neighborhood where you practice every day.
You feel familiar.
Another example.
Imagine you’re hosting a party at your house.
You did all the organizing, you told a few friends, and told them to bring a few friends.
Maybe you got a huge raise so you’re feeling pretty good.
A bunch of people in your house.
All enjoying the food and drink that you provided.
Easy Conversations
Would it be difficult to circulate and say hey to everybody?
Probably not.
Now consider being by yourself at a club or a bar.
Would be difficult to circulate and say hey to everybody?
It would be much more difficult than at your own house.
This is when they mean when they say, “own your space.”
The physical space around you.
The space in your brain.
The people around you.
Now add on the idea of becoming the “sorter.”
Of becoming the qualifier.
This only works if you have a plan for your life.
A direction you’re going in.
Old School Ambition
A general idea of the ideal partner.
Most don’t have either of these.
Most wander through life, without a plan, hoping something good will happen to them.
Most wander through life hoping for a little bit of attention from the opposite sex.
Which means most people will take whatever they can get.
They radiate a “please accept me” energy.
A “please accept me” frame.
But when you take some time to build a true direction for your life, you’ll naturally ditch that desperation.
When you have some actual criteria for the people you allow in your life, it will be even easier to ditch that desperation.
This will get you a frame that is very, very rare today.
The “party host” frame.
Brain Management
Your brain, your space, your life.
There are those that belong in your life, your space, and your brain.
And those that don’t.
This is the frame you lead with.
“Are you qualified, or not?”
This frame is very attractive.
Very rare.
Very desirable.
And extremely seductive.
Cultivate this frame, and everything will fall into place.
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