Basic Rapport
A long time ago I used to sell cars.
The first thing they told us to create rapport.
This is something everybody’s heard a kajillion times.
So everybody thinks they know how to do it.
There are many, many, levels of rapport
Like talking to people about hobbies.
Movies, sports etc.
Most people like movies, sports etc.
This is a very superficial level of support.
Something that lives up on top the surface.
What In Common
And some guys get a little crazy with this surface level rapport.
This is “we have a lot in common” rapport.
You both like the same sports teams, actors, singers etc.
Then there is deeper rapport.
Based on structural ideas.
Like the feeling of fear before giving a public speech.
Or when you are away from home but you have a feeling you forgot to do something, like turn off the AC.
These are common experiences.
A bit deeper than common interests.
Then there are common experiences that represent important life issues.
Experiential Rapport
Like when you are halfway through college, you are starting to wonder if you maybe chose the wrong major.
Or it’s a week before your marriage and you are seriously getting cold feet.
You’re thinking about maybe fleeing the country.
These are deep issues that can create deep rapport.
But they are also not quite enough.
Since EVERYBODY has issues like these.
Everybody has experiences like these.
What’s much better is a kind of “laser targeted” rapport.
Where you find out the deep desires and fears of your partner, or target.
Their own UNIQUE version of these things.
Common Desires
Everybody wants a better job.
Everybody wants more money.
Everybody wants a better house, more respect, more free time, etc.
But every single person has a very unique idea of what these things mean to them.
And at the same time, most people wouldn’t really be able to describe these in much detail.
That’s where you come in.
Dig Deeper Than Most
With a very powerful conversational style.
To help them get clarity on these big ideas.
Without much thinking on their part.
This will do two things.
One, they won’t need to do a lot of work, but they’ll feel fantastic.
Two, is they’ll have a very rare feeling that you are interested in them.
Not their body or anything superficial.
Their deep, inner sense of self they’ve never shared with anybody.
This will create a deep yearning within them.
For you.
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