Long time ago I used to work at Disneyland.
I worked in the “guest research” department. Basically we collected data from park attendees, to support marketing. Mostly demographics.
We walked around with these iPad looking things and walked up to random strangers and asked them a bunch of questions.
In a given day, we’d each talk to 500-1000 people.
(as an aside, this is a GREAT way to DESTROY approach anxiety…)
One thing WE ALL noticed, most especially the women in the department, was that most guys (guests) were absolutely and completely spineless.
Not very nice, but you should have heard some of the things these female coworkers would say about the male guests while we were sitting around the break room.
Why do I say these guys so spineless?
In order to keep the data “pure,” whenever we approached a group of people, we had to choose one person, in our mind, and then go up and talk to that person. All of the answers that we recorded had to come from them.
Often times we’d choose the “beta” of the group, and the “alpha” of the group would step in and answer the questions. If that happened we’d have to explain our data collection methods, etc, so we could get in and out without problems.
But whenever we approached a couple, and chose the guy, the same thing ALWAYS happened.
I’m talking from experience of talking to AT LEAST 2000 couples in the time I worked there.
It went like this.
We’d ask the guy, and his wife (or girlfriend) would ALWAYS step in and start answering the questions.
We’d explain that was “statistically invalid,” since we approached him, and he had to give the answers. We would even say that they had to come out of his mouth.
Nevertheless, with EVERY SINGLE COUPLE, and EVERY SINGLE ANSWER, it went like this.
We’d ask the question. The guy would think about it. He’d come up with an answer. And then…
He would ALWAYS look to his wife or girlfriend to “check,” and make sure she agreed with his answer.
This happened again, and again and again.
Naturally, this is something you want to avoid at all costs.
It was evident to all the guys as well as the girls, that these guys were weak, and unattractive.
Moral of the story?
If you want to appear attractive, dominant and strong in the eyes of women, avoid the need to “check” your decisions or choices with anybody.
Make them, and act on them.