Whenever we talk to somebody, it’s usually with some kind of intention in mind, usually subconscious.
You’re talking to your buddies, and you may be having an intention of getting a laugh.
You’re talking to a girl, and your intention may be to create enough attraction so she’ll give you her number.
You’re talking to your client, and your intention may be to get them to see the value of your proposition.
You interrupt a stranger on the street, and your intention may be to convince them you’re not a psycho ax murder, so they’ll give you directions to the freeway.
In every one of these cases, you’ve got an outcome, and it requires their participation.
Since everybody has their own agenda, conscious or unconscious, whether or not you get your outcome will depend on how well you solicit their cooperation.
In short, you’ve got to show them how getting what you want is going to benefit them. Otherwise, you’re not much different than a pickpocket. Even people that give free money to homeless people do it for the boost in self esteem.
Often times, this is unconscious, and automatic. When you stop somebody for directions, for example, you put on a kind face, open with some softeners, and mentally place yourself “below” them. Experience has taught us that this is the best way to get information from a stranger.
But when the stakes are higher, sometimes our instincts aren’t enough. A lot of us don’t have a lot of experience closing big deals or getting numbers from gorgeous girls.
When this happens, consider taking some time to imagine what it’s like to be them, seeing you approach them. Imagine, for a minute, you’re in THEIR shoes. Naturally, this is a hallucination, (unless you’ve got some verified psychic skills) so it’s just your imagination.
But you’ll be surprised how much it can help out with your “pitch.”
When you see things from their perspective, and EVERYBODY want something, getting what you want will be a lot easier.
Naturally, using the right language patterns can make that a lot easier.
To see how, visit this: