The idea of being “outcome independent” has been around for a long time.
At least a couple thousand years.
It’s one of the prime recommendations of stoicism.
To focus on the shooting of the arrow, and not on the hitting of the target.
This is exactly why they say, “keep your eye on the ball” in sports.
When you swing a baseball bat, you want to watch the bat hit the ball.
This is focusing on the shooting of the arrow.
Or being “outcome independent.”
Of not concerning yourself with where the ball goes.
If you look up and try to swing for the fences you’ll increase the probability of missing.
Of striking out.
This is the same as having a conversation with an outcome.
Getting them to laugh, getting a sale, getting hired.
If you focus too much on the outcome, you’ll won’t pay very much attention to the shooting of the arrow.
To the conversation itself.
The less you focus on the outcome, sale, number of whatever, the more you focus on the conversation, the more likely you’ll get the outcome.
This held true when I used to sell cars.
The more I focused (or hoped) on getting a sale, the less sales I got.
The more I focused ONLY on the conversation with a POTENTIAL customer, the more sales I got.
Similar to successful outcomes with pretty ladies.
The more you focus ONLY on having a pleasant conversation, the more likely you’ll get a number.
This, however, like many ancient recommendations on how to live a fulfilling life, is much easier said than done.
If you see a pretty girl and she is your ONLY option, it’s nearly impossible.
But if you truly see her as one of many pretty girls in your life, she’s NOT the only option.
So it’s much easier to forget about any outcome and simply enjoy the conversation.
This will put you into an ENTIRELY different category in her mind.
That you are a fantastic conversationalist.
That you aren’t super thirsty like most dudes she talks to.
This MUST mean you’ve got plenty of options.
Which will drive her crazy if you DON’T ask for the number.
So much that she’ll think about asking for YOUR number.
If you chase ONLY outcomes, you’ll find very few.
But if you forget about outcomes, and enjoy the shooting of the arrow, so to speak, you’ll find outcomes chasing you.
Mind Persuasion has plenty of books and courses to teach you how to speak hypnotically and persuasively.