The more congruent you are, the more effective you’ll be.
The less congruent you are the more you’ll put out vibes, on an unconscious level, that will turn people off.
But what is congruence?
Basically it means that all “parts” of you are on the same page.
Let’s say you walk into a dealership, thinking of buying a Toyota. The salesperson goes through a classical sales pitch, eliciting values, demonstrating how the Toyota will fit your specific criteria.
On paper, it sounds great, and he’ll likely get a lot of sales. Yet, there’s something not quite right.
Unless the guy actually drives a Toyota, and really truly believes they are the best car around, he’s not going to have 100% congruence. So at least part of you will be able to “sniff out” that part of HIM that doesn’t believe what he’s saying.
Even if you, as a salesperson, own the car, it’s hard to be 100% congruent. Why? Maybe you believe in the product, but you don’t believe that you have a “right” to tell somebody else how to spend their money.
Maybe you recognize that while you think it’s the best car, they might not. Maybe you have a belief deep inside you that says, “it’s dangerous to tell other people what to do.”
However, congruence is perhaps the most persuasive thing there is. Anybody who is 100% congruent will be able to lead people to the ends of the Earth.
Think about this next time you’re about to persuade somebody.
Ask yourself “Are there any parts of me that have a problem with what I’m trying to accomplish?”
See what happens.