Never underestimate the power of the human ego.
In pretty much any kind of persuasion or conversation, most of us are a split between information and ego.
Meaning whatever we’re trying to convince people of, either friends, customers, or potential lovers, half of the message is the content of the message, while the other half is all about us.
I know, this is hard pill to swallow. At least it was for me, for a long, long time. But once I learned to get my ego out of the way, persuading people was a LOT easier.
Here’s an example of a message that is more ego based than “content” based. Somebody’s trying to convince a group of friends to something, and nobody’s buying it. Maybe see a certain movie, or go to a certain restaurant. This person gives up. Only a few minutes later, somebody else in the group suggests the same thing, and surprisingly, everybody agrees.
Now, if you’re the guy making the initial suggestion, and you’ve got a normal sized ego, you’re going to feel upset because they accepted THEIR idea but not YOUR idea, even though it was the SAME idea.
But if you’ve learned to let go your ego, you’ll be GLAD because the idea is now going to happen, whatever it may be. You don’t care who gets credit for this, so long as you’re seeing the movie you want, or going to the restaurant they want.
Truth is that being a completely “ego-less” persuader is MUCH more powerful. If you don’t care who gets credit, you can accomplish a lot more.
Take politics for example. Most the guys with REAL power aren’t the guys blathering away on TV all the time. It’s the guys behind the scenes, pulling the strings that are the real puppet masters. The fact that they don’t care if they’re recognized or not makes them INCREDIBLY powerful.
Doesn’t matter WHO gets elected, these guys will still dominate.
Back to ordinary persuasion, this works just a well. Especially when you allow the person you’re persuading the allusion that it’s really THEIR idea, not yours.
Most people are amazed how easy it is to persuade others when you simply forget YOUR ego, and focus on the ego of the person your persuading.