When you approach a girl, chances are your brain is oscillating between two states.
One hoping for success, and all the it entails, and the dreading failure, and all that IT entails.
This kind of gets you out of the real world, and into your head.
Try this mental trick out, and see if it helps.
The truth is that most girls are just as nervous as guys when they get approached.
Now, I know that gurus teach that hot girls get approached all the time, and are totally used to people trying all kinds of advanced game, but this just isn’t true. It may help to sell their products (because then you’d feel the need to learn super advanced game techniques), but it doesn’t reflect reality.
This is a kind of pedestaling, in a way. If you assume she’s so hot, and gets approached so often, that she’s a stone cold conversational killer, that’s pretty much putting her up on a huge pedestal.
In reality, she’s just as nervous as you. Maybe she is, maybe she isn’t. But assuming that she’s as nervous as you will do a couple of helpful things.
One is it will make you less nervous. Knowing the person you’re talking to is nervous seems to make us more confident.
Second is it will make you more “real,” and less “fake.”
Imagine talking to a five year old girl who’s about to burst into tears because she’s terrified of you. Would you feel the need to run game or use any kind of patterns?
Or would you be as kind and gentle as possible? To make her feel more relaxed?
The third and most important thing is if you approach with a frame of kindness, rather than manipulation, you’ll feel ZERO pressure to try and qualify yourself to her.
You’ll naturally hold the dominant frame, which means she’ll naturally qualify herself to you.
No fake “alpha” BS required.
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