One of the presuppositions of NLP is that the more flexibility you have in any given situation, the better off you are. Like if you’re building a birdhouse, you’d be better off with more tools than less tools. If you’re boxing, you’re better off with more defensive and offensive skills than less skills. If you’re […]
When Did You Stop Beating Your Wife?
Linguistic Presuppositions There’s a powerful set of language patterns called presuppositions. You can use these to imply some incredible things about you or your product or your idea, that makes it sound compelling to your listener or reader. But these can also be used destructively, and in fact this is how most people use them. […]
A Most Indispensable Skill
Trying to predict the behavior of others is always fraught with danger. But when you have an expectation of how somebody will behave, and they don’t? This can cause serious problems. Say you’re walking into a potential client’s office. You’ve got a big sales pitch planned. If you land a contract, it could be worth […]
Same Or Different?
One of the ways we sort thing is by putting them into categories of “sameness” or “difference.” Let’s say you go to a new restaurant, let’s say an Italian place, that you’ve never been do before. Maybe it just opened up, or maybe you discovered it on a roundabout way home from work. Anyhow, there […]
What’s The Meaning Of Life?
Meaning is a slippery thing. You say “hi” to somebody. You think it “means” that you’re being polite. They were expecting a hug, so they think it “means” you’re being rude. Who’s right? Are you both right? Are you both wrong? What’s the meaning of your life? Short answer: Whatever you want it to mean. […]
The “As If” Frame
Sometimes you’ve gotta fake it till you make it. You’ve doubtless heard this before, but what does it mean? A great way to do this is through the “as if” frame. Let’s say you’d like to be a highly persuasive person, able to walk up to anybody, friend or stranger, and start talking in beautiful […]
What Motivates You?
When you think about doing something, from where do you get more motivation? Are you motivated internally or externally? Internally, by your own criteria, and how you’ll judge yourself, or externally, based on the criteria of others and how they’ll judge you? For most of us, we’re a mix of both. Which is better? It […]
Cold Water Or Vacations?
Most of us talk in metaphors quite often, without really knowing it consciously. For example, how would you describe that initial bit of awkwardness when first talking to a cute girl? Or that feeling of anxiety when going out for a night of number closes? Many folks have described it as like jumping in a […]
Where Does NLP Come From?
Plenty of people think that politicians are “trained” in NLP and are using some kind of super secret wicked powerful manipulation to woo the voters. That’s how they get away with such ridiculous shenanigans that would quickly land you are I in the clink. But are they really using NLP? Yes, and no. See, NLP […]
What Are Your Filters?
Your brain is an amazing tool that you most likely take for granted. After all, how often do you think about how you think? About as often as a fish contemplates the water he’s swimming around in, right? But consider this: Every single second your senses are hit with millions of bits of information. PER […]