Why The Seduction Market Will Always Be Hot
If you created a time capsule in your back yard, crawled into it and came out 5,000 years into the future, you’d find a lot of things different. Different language. Different monetary system. The people might even look a little different (although 5,000 years is a blink in evolutionary times). But one thing would be the same:
There would be products for men to help them get laid.
Why So Many Seduction Products?
Many of these exist for pure market economics reasons. There will always be a demand for products like this. There will always be men who are not getting enough sex. And any time there is a huge market for a product, there will always be products being sold.
Humans Gotta Eat
One easy way to see this in action is the food market. No human can live very long without food. We all need a couple thousands of calories every single day or we’ll die. Consequently, there is a gigantic international market for food of all kinds.
All the way from basic agricultural technology to expensive meals at expensive restaurants, and all the frozen burritos in between. Because every single human needs to eat, there will always be people on Earth making and selling food.
Sex Is The Prime Directive
They say a chicken is an egg’s way of making another egg. Another way to describe us humans is replicators. We eat so we can live. We live so we can replicate. To make copies of ourselves. In fact, pretty much everything we do, you could argue we do those things so we can get laid. At least from men’s perspective.
Male Vs. Female Strategies
In our human species, males and females have separate strategies. Women are programmed to find the very best provider possible. Having a kid and raising it until he’s self sufficient takes a lot of time. All the ladies in the past who didn’t care very much who they got pregnant by didn’t have kids that survived. Since they were banging guys who didn’t stick around, neither they nor their kids lasted very long.
In the harsh world of evolutionary survival, the only females who exist on planet Earth are descended from ladies who were ultra careful about who they got down with. Sure, it may not seem like that down at your local meet market, but that’s the way they are wired. For men, though, we have a much different strategy.
Bang Anything That Will Let You
Women can be seen as the gatekeepers to the next generation. They only have sex with guys that prove they will be good providers. They get to sit back and pick and choose who these guys are. Even in our modern messed up society, girls have way more choice than guys when it comes to getting down. What does this mean?
All Men Are Undersexed
This means that unless you are a world class athlete, musician, hedge fund manager or politician, eager girls looking for love are few and far between. It’s always been this way. The girls choose who they have sex with. The guys compete with one another for the coveted role of provider to a wife and kids.
Huge Market For Sex Products
No, we don’t mean robots. We mean products and guides and techniques to help men get laid. Since every single guy is undersexed (even guys who are married get less sex than they want), this means that every single guy is a potential mark for the seduction industry. Once we understand a little bit about human nature, we’ll understand why there are so many goofy sounding products out there, and why so many guys are getting rich selling them.
Most Men Lack Confidence
Another thing that is very common among men (besides being undersexed) is that most men lack confidence. By this, we mean most men lack a very specific kind of confidence. The confidence of speaking in a relaxed and friendly way to an attractive woman.
Why No Confidence?
There is many potential reasons for this. Why most men are this way isn’t so important as is simply admitting this. One reason is that men are always undersexed. When they talk to an attractive woman, it’s not something they’ve done very much of. They also don’t have a backup plan. When a guy has a girlfriend, he doesn’t talk to any single women in hopes of getting some. So when he does talk to an attractive woman, he is either going to be successful with the lady he’s talking to, or he’s going home alone.
So even without knowing much about his background, just from a simple structural understanding of when and why men talk to attractive women, when he does, he’s playing with scared money, so to speak. From his perspective, one small mistake and he’s going home alone. But from her perspective, she’s the one doing the picking and choosing, so she’s still got plenty of chances.
Terrified Of Rejection
The worst fear of most guys is that he’ll put his emotions out on the line, tell the girl he likes her and she’ll flat out reject him. His worst fear is usually him saying something like this:
“I think you’re really pretty and I’d like to take you to dinner. May I have your phone number?”
With her saying something horrific like this:
“I’m not interested in you. I don’t want to go out with you. Please leave me alone.”
This next bit is going to sound a bit Freudian, but bear with me. Ever since we learned to walk (instead of just crawling) we’ve been holy hell to our parents, usually our moms. After the ages of two, all men have a kajillion experiences of asking for what we want, usually from mom, and getting told no. So when we walk across the bar to talk to a pretty lady, it sort of resonates with these experiences.
All the way back before we learned to think, we associated expressing our needs with rejection. Ever since we started crying as a means to get mom’s attention, and she left us lying in our own poop for an eternity (or a few minutes in baby time) we made another horrible connection. Getting rejected means we are somehow deficient. This was never said or spoken or even thought, but the connection was made when men were very young. Expressing our needs to a female is very, very dangerous.
Enter The Seduction Guru
Now we’re ready to understand how seduction products are sold and marketed. We know that all guys are horny, since they are undersexed. We also know that all guys are more or less terrified whenever they talk to attractive women. Or at the very least, they feel nervous and on the spot when they talk to attractive women. And they are terrified of asking for what they want, and getting rejected.
Nearly all seduction products are designed to seemingly circumvent this natural ask and receive (or ask and get rejected) structure. They are usually some marketed as some sneaky way to bypass her normal mind, of getting under the radar, or somehow disengaging this natural ask and receive process.
The Problem Gets Deeper
But here’s the thing, and it’s a very subtle issue. It involves how we humans are very clever with how we deceive ourselves. Most guys would never admit they are afraid to talk to women. But few men, unless they are stone cold players or sociopaths, don’t at least feel a little nervous when talking to a pretty lady.
This makes it very hard to get to the root of the issue, if most men can’t even acknowledge the issue. Instead of admitting this fear, or lack of confidence, most men come up with a story that is much more protective of the fragile male ego. Here are some common “surface structure” problems with lack of success with women:
I don’t know where to go
I don’t know what to say
I don’t find women interesting
The dating market sucks
I’m too busy
I don’t know how to overcome the boyfriend objection
I don’t know how to overcome the “X” objection
How This Plays Out
So you’ve got a guy who would like to do better with women. His main sticking point is he’s afraid to walk over and talk to girls. But since he doesn’t admit that to himself, he believes it’s another reason. He doesn’t know what to say, or something similar. So he buys some cool sounding seduction course with the cool sounding marketing angle. But because it doesn’t address his core issue (he’s afraid) he never actually tries this new seduction product.
Is It Really Fear?
Talking to girls is a skill. And all skills can be improved upon. If you practiced the piano every day for a year, you’d be a pretty good piano player. If you spent thirty minutes every day studying Photoshop, you’d be a pretty good Photoshopper after year.
Girls are no different. But it takes a lot of confidence to talk to girls every day. Just talking to them is uncomfortable to most guys. Most guys end up standing in line next to a cute girl at the supermarket and it takes all of their confidence just to say hi. So the idea of purposely going out, day after day, just to practice talking to girls is something very few people will ever do.
So call it what you want. Fear, lack of confidence, anxiety. Not just to approach one girl one time, but to purposely practice talking to girls every day, just like you would practice playing the piano or any other recognized skill ever day.
Few Self Help Products Ever Consumed
Learning a new skill is tedious and frustrating. That’s regular skills like playing the piano or learning something like Photoshop. But any skill that requires doing something uncomfortable on top of the normal skill-learning frustrating is going to be much less likely to be done over a long period of time.
How many people decide to learn the guitar, buy a guitar but never really play? Quite a few. This is just due to the boredom and frustration of practice. But learning any kind of social skills (seduction, sales, networking, etc.) or business skills (sales, marketing, entrepreneurialism, etc.) is much less likely to be followed through. It’s not only frustrating, but it’s downright scary!
So seduction products, business products, communication products, these things are rarely, if ever, put to use by the people that purchase them. But a curious thing also happens.
Shiny New Object Syndrome
What generally happens is somebody buys something like a seduction product. Maybe it’s got plenty of videos, plenty of interesting concepts. While the guy is busily learning this new concept, he’s excited about his potential future. So this product gives him a good month or two where he can imagine a much better future with the ladies.
But once he goes through the product, and fully understands all the concepts, normal human procrastination kicks on. He goes a month, then another, then another. Now he’s got three choices. Choice one is to go back through the course again. Choice two is to give up completely, and accept a life of celibacy. Choice three is to buy the next product.
Why Another Product?
If it’s marketed correctly, it will sound like it’s got just the thing that the previous product didn’t have. It’s got that one extra step that will make everything all click together. With this new product, and the new groundbreaking techniques included, he’s sure to be a lady killer. But then the same thing happens. Product consumption. Human procrastination. Shiny new object.
This creates a very interesting environment for the creators and marketers of these seduction products. If you sell cheeseburgers, you can only get so far with clever marketing. If your cheeseburgers suck, you’ll go out of business in a hurry. But with seduction products (and on a larger scale pretty much every self development product) few people will ever use them.
When cheeseburgers shops are in competition with other cheeseburger shops, they are trying to make a better cheeseburger. Or a cheaper cheeseburger. Or a healthier cheeseburger. All of the competition is on the product itself. But with seduction and self-help products, the competition is on the marketing. Because few people will ever actually use the product to determine if it works or not.
You’re Doing It Wrong
Even if somebody legitimately tries one of the latest seduction products, and it doesn’t work, it’s very easy to blame the user, and not the product. If you bought a cheeseburger and found it was made out of sawdust instead of hamburger meat, you’d ask for a refund in a jiffy. But all self help products are based very much on the user. All users know this, so they much less likely to ask for a refund than somebody who just bit into a sawdust burger.
So people selling seduction products can get away with murder. Well, not really murder. But they can say the craziest things about their products, since they are pretty sure few people will ever try them. Even if the product was as simple as memorizing one sentence, and saying it to ten girls, most guys would be too scared to do that. Remember, most guys have a hard time starting a conversation with a cute girl standing next in line to them at the supermarket.
Target Market Is Terrified Of Girls
The guys who don’t have any problems starting conversations with cute girls aren’t the guys buying all the seduction products. The guys buying the seduction products specifically are the guys too shy to start a conversation with a girl at the supermarket. Or if they do, they don’t go very far beyond saying hi.
The solution is to not keep buying seduction product after seduction product. The solution is to start talking to people. All people, not just cute girls. Being socially outgoing will do plenty of things for you. It will make you much more comfortable around a lot more people. It will give you interesting things to talk about. The more people you talk to, the more interesting stories you’ll hear from others.
Most people wait to start a conversation until they see somebody interesting. This is like waiting to start exercising until you can run a sub 5 minute mile. It’s backward thinking. Start talking to people to build the skill of talking to people. The more people you talk to, the more interesting people will become.
See talking to people as exercise. At first it sucks. It takes a lot of willpower. So go slow. Start off by smiling at strangers. Or even just making eye contact. See building up social skills as you would exercise. Start slow, and build slow. It’s not something you learn and then stop doing. People that exercise will exercise for the rest of their lives.
See building social skills the same way. Start as slowly as you can. Don’t expect it to be easy. Don’t do it only when it feels easy. Do it every day, just like you would force yourself to do situps and pushups every day. Start off with eye contact, move up to smiles, then conversations.
First Goal – Conversations With People
Once you are comfortable starting and maintaining a conversation with a human, you can start thinking about talking to girls. There’s no rush. Once you start conversations with people just to see what they’re all about, start talking to cute girls.
Second Goal – Conversations With Girls
Slowly move into random conversations with girls. Since you will have been talking to normal people, this should be easy. Don’t worry about closing or anything. Just enjoy female conversations. Believe it or not, once you get to this level, the rest of it will happen naturally. Remember, once upon a time there weren’t very many people on planet Earth. Now there are billions. Meeting and hooking up is something we are very good at, on an instinctive level.
Mind Persuasion has plenty of books and courses filled with useful strategies to help you get much more out of life with much less effort.